You are in a full-fledged female led relationship with your wife. She is your Dom and she takes charge. Both of you are flourishing in the dynamic but after some time you realize that your wife isn’t as dominant as she used to be. Or maybe, she has become a little vanilla. Maybe at times, she ‘asks’ for things instead of ‘ordering’. And you are wondering what you should do when your mistress falls into the vanilla zone?
It Happens
Your mistress can fall back into the vanilla zone for plenty of reasons. Either she could be happy with the FLR dynamic or she could be dissatisfied.
When she is dissatisfied, she will slip back to the vanilla zone. I have written a whole article explaining this earlier.
When a woman is happy with you and your services, two possible scenarios are there.
One, she will take more charge, she will be more dominant and she will be more authoritative.
Second, her soft side will emerge because she appreciates your efforts. She will feel lucky and special because she has got such a wonderful man who fulfills her every whim. And to reward you, she will pamper you or talk sweetly to you or maybe make extra efforts to make you feel special.
The slave dilemma
You have been trying your best to satisfy your mistress. You enjoyed her reign and you hoped that the more you will act submissive, the more she will be dominant.
Well, you did not think wrong, it is the usual scenario. But now you find it counterintuitive. The more you make efforts for her, the more she wants to return the favors.
Though you both are still in the dynamic, her dominant side is less visible. And you are now confused if you should communicate your feelings with her, or should you wait, or should you become less obedient, or do WHAT??
A new perspective
Your first step should be to try to adapt to the new normal.
“WHAT? I did not expect this answer from you Miss Sana. What are you even saying?”
I know but hear me out.
This is where you are getting a reality check of being a submissive. Obedience is still the key. It remains the key but the focus now shifts from craving kinks from your Mistress to finding joy in her satisfaction, regardless of how it is achieved.
She might find joy in cooking for you, or she might find joy in lending a helping hand in the chores that you used to do alone.
You should be attentive, devoted and eager to please even if the thrills are now simpler. Learn to cherish the quiet moments of connection in your Female Led Relationship as well.
After all, devotion knows no bounds and a true slave finds fulfillment in serving, right?
What next?
If you are not able to cope with the dynamic because you feel unfulfilled, you should communicate openly. Tell her that you miss the kinks, you miss those little gestures of dominance and so on.
The spark should not fade out. On the other hand, you should also realize that getting mature in a relationship is a part of growth. However, growth is no justification for feeling unfulfilled.
Thus, communication remains the key. If she has the intention of dominating you behind her vanilla actions, this is a good sign.
If she is still considering herself as your dom and acknowledges the fact that she looks at you as a sub, that is a good sign.
Conclusion
Serving more diligently definitely makes her more dominant. Her actions can either become more dominant or she can get more comfortable in her role and think that she no longer needs to act dominant to get obedience from you.
Try to embrace her in either scenario. After all, her satisfaction is the ultimate priority for a slave. In the end, never hesitate to communicate your feelings in your female led relationship.
